By David Ender

Can also be sung in Irish pubs around the world. Make it raucous!


Theresa, Theresa, you’re such a hearty sneezer,
take your face out of the freezer
for a while!
Give me a smile,
give me a shake,
let’s take a bite off the big financial cake.
Then chew our cud (in a Manchester pub)
and go for good –
leave all the others singing ‘In the Mood’!

Theresa, Theresa, let’s have Chorizo pizza
on the bonnie shores of Pisa
or Versailles!
Eat Brussels sprouts
(it’s good for gout!)
and congratulate ourselves that we’ve got clout.
You know our way
in the flowery month of May;
may all the other dunkheads go astray!

Theresa, Theresa, you are a mighty teaser,
let’s show the union sleazers
that they’re fools!
You kick them in the bums –
we’ll pay the damage sums.
Then take a run (or make a break)
and exit well
let all the other geezers go to hell!


Rule, Britannia, Rule!